Yankee Doodle Dandy

I know it's grainy. Please forgive me. I took this picture two days before I left the States to move to Europe back in '05. That next Fourth of July I spent in Greece on a beach in the town of Bali. I was very aware of the Fourth that night. Maybe it was because I was getting ready to come home that I had already begun to sink back in to that American mindset. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that I was waving a sparkler around. Yesterday, though, came and went with barely any recognition on my part that it was the Fourth of July. I barely even realized it was Saturday. When you've not been working for a month, the days of the week tend to blend together. As I read everyone's status updates on Facebook last night, though, I quickly realized how important that holiday is to us as American's even if we mostly don't realize it.

 I know for a lot of us it has lost its real meaning. I don't think it's unfair to say, however, that how it makes us feel is a part of its meaning. The intangible quality of ketchup and tomato seeds running down your hand from a soggy hamburger bun has sunk deep into our soul. The tang of onions mixed with yellow mustard on a hotdog that was cooked just a little too long;the smell of the air just after the explosion of a string of Black Cats; that nervous feeling you get waiting to see which one of the volleys is actually the grand finale, wanting to see the big one but deep down knowing you hope it never comes to steal the last of the excitement; even the small disappointments of bottlerockets that fizz out against the fading light, of reaching into the bag only to find you are holding the last of this year's ordinance; these things–all of these things–have become an indelible part of Americana. To relish in that is patriotism, or at least a part. These days there are a lot of people my age who sometimes find it hard to be proud of America, but these are things to be proud of. I think that in a lot of ways, the Fourth of July is like Christmas. It appeals to us in the States as a sacred holiday. And I don't really think it's because of the soldiers and the revolutionary war. I think it's because in so many ways, the Fourth of July makes us feel like a kid again. And that's something we don't usually see anymore. And yesterday I missed it.